I'm still here, and I'm grateful, because otherwise I would be missing this. Sometimes it's good to be awake.
~Finch p. 42
Water is peaceful. I am at rest. in the water, I am safe and pulled in where I can't get out. Everything slows down - the noise and the racing of my thoughts. ~Finch p. 106
I'm up the rest of the night making a list called "How to Stay Awake" There's the obvious -Red Bill, caffeine, NoDoz and other drugs - but this isn't about skipping a couple hours' sleep, it's about staying up and staying here for the long haul.
1. Run
2. Write (this includes any thoughts I don't want to have - write them out fast so they're out of me and on the paper).
3. Along those lines, accept any and all thoughts (don't be afraid of them no matter what they are).
4. Surround myself with water.
5. Plan
6. Drive anywhere and everywhere, even when there's nowhere to go. (Note: There's always somewhere to go.)
7. Plat guitar.
8. Organize room, notes, thoughts. (This is different from planning.)
9. Do whatever it takes to remind myself that I'm still here and have a say.
10. Violet
You have to live your life like you'll never be sorry. It's easier just to do the right thing from the start so there's nothing to apologize for. ~Finch p.129
Before I die I want to Play guitar like Jimmy Page. Come up with a song that will change the world. Find the Great Manifesto. Count for something. Be the person I'm meant to be and have that be enough. Know what it's like to have a best friend. Matter. ~Finch p.135
Before I die I want to stop being afraid. Stop thinking too much. Fill the holes left behind. Drive again. Write. Breathe. ~Violet p.135
I know life well enough to know you can't count on things staying around or standing still, no matter how much you want them to. ~Finch p.139
Better to keep the unhappy, mad, bad, unpleasant words separate, where you can watch them and make sure they don't surprise you when you're not expecting them. ~ Finch in response to Decca removing negative words from books. (Think tabloids) p.166
"Growth itself contains the germ of happiness."Pearl S. Buck ~Violet brainstorming ideas for her new blog, Germ p.190
"Well, Robert Jordan knows he's going to die. 'There is only now', he says, 'and if now is only two days, then two days your life and everything in it will be in proportion.' None of us knows how long we have , maybe another month, maybe another fifty years - I like living as if I only have that two days." ~ Finch p. 194
Sometimes, things feel true to us even if they're not. ~ Finch p. 195
The thing I know about bipolar disorder is that it's a label. One you give crazy people. ~Finch p. 271
Actually I am, which is part of the problem; we are all alone, trapped in these bodies and our own minds, and whatever company we have in this life is only fleeting and superficial. ~Finch p. 272 In response to being told, "you are not alone."
All I know is what I wonder: Which of my feelings are real? Which of the mes is me? ~ Finch p.315
What a terrible feeling to love someone and not be able to help them. ~Violet p.349
If I think about him, he won't be completely gone either. Just because they're dead, they don't have to be. ~ Violet p.361
The thing I realize is that it's not what you take, it's what you leave. ~Violet p. 376
